Friday, February 02, 2007
Does this make you a bad parent?
OK go with me here on this..A)Single Mom to 2 boys ages 4 and 14, Single Mom works 2jobs and goes to school, 14yr old father has not been in child's life since he was a child, 4 yr old father lives about 2hrs away and sees son every now and then. Now 14yr old has been sexually active since he was about 11, to make sure her son doesn't get some girl pregnant she buys him Condoms. Keep in mind Mom works and goes to school so who has to keep and take care of 4yr old? Yes the 14yr old. He has recently been accusing Mom of not caring and just needs him for a babysitter, also 14yr old has taken up smoking weed. He tells Mom she needs to understand that he "needs" to do this at times. Now Mom, has about 10 men on speed dial that she calls to buy her stuff, not cut friends just makes them buy her things, because she wants them too, they are good friends. Well sons See's this and they want her to buy them whatever they want, she doesn't understand why? She also doesn't understand why she gives 14 yr old everything and he doesn't care at all about her and chooses to continue to be bad at school and smoke pot, no the sex is not a problem.
B) Mom of 2 daughters, oldest daughter is 14 her father lives in Florida. Second daughter is 4 her Mom and Daddy are married. Husband also has 2 sons from previous marriage. Now, 14yr old skips school, "fixes" her report card to A's, and is a obitual(sp) liar. Mom has talked to the child and tried to find out what the problem is but doesn't understand, not really sure if it matters but this is a very "Pro Black" home. Now Mom is suspecting that daughter might be sexually active, she wants her checked. Mom from "A" tells her "Girl just go get her some Depo" Mom says Um No, I will not give my child permission to have sex. Mom "A" doesn't understand this.
C) Mom of 3 girls, 18,12,10. Now this is a divorced Mom, who has the 2 youngest children living with her, the oldest lives with Father about 1-2hrs away. Mom is a very weak person, she has rules but seems to be more interested in " A Man", oldest daughter is a week away from being 18, daughter is at the stage where she doesn't want to report to her parents and recently decided to tell them she is Gay, and now finds out that she has flunked out of High School. Mom in a state of crying states that I will love you no matter what, and my door is always open for you to come and stay back with me but... You have to follow my rules, you will not disrupt the life that I have tried to make since the divorce from your father 4yrs ago, you will not come in and disturb your sisters life, you will be good. Your gonna go to counseling AND I cant afford your car payment and Insurance so your Daddy is gonna have to keep paying that and raise the Child Support.
OK now which of those stories are true??? They all are, all 3 of these scenarios happened this week to be exact. Now my opinion, Mom A and C inform me that just wait till my kids become teenagers just wait and see what I'm gonna go through that I have no IDEA, well they are wrong how? OK here we go time to step on the toes.
First my Mom always made it clear with children you have to teach them right from wrong you start when the start, you dont wait for the problem to start you head it off at the pass. THATS why when my kids starting touching something they wasn't suppose to I didn't move it, that's an excuse for them, I told them No, 2nd time they touched it they got their hand popped, that usually worked, but you see my point is that you cant just wait till they get pass that "AWWW I know I shouldn't laugh but their just so cute when they do that!!" NO you do something then, when you get onto them don't do it with a " aaww Hunny please don't do that or Hunny, mommy said no" No, you be firm this is not a time for loving them, trust me their will be plenty of time for that, because if you don't your gonna have that kid in public that cannot be controlled that kid that tells YOU what to do, I can say that not ONE of my kids have ever told me NO, as if they was not gonna do something I told them to do. Now as for when they become teenagers I cant predict the future, BUT I can say this In my home their are rules, their are curfews, their will not be any running down to the store and me buying them condoms and birth control pills. I do not condone that! You see I have taught my kids since they were very little about life, I have taught them the good things and the bad, was they too young to understand it or know about it? I'm sure some would think so, but I can say that if you train them up as babes they will know right from wrong. As for A and B's crap about "Their" life, OK First when you have kids that is your life, their is no its all about me and some Tom, Dick and Harry you wanta screw this weekend that your child is gonna mess up by being around! COME ON! I really wander sometimes why people even have children! You cant be selfish and think of yourself! You have children to raise not your 14yr old! You chose to have that child so pull your head out of your ass and stop being fucking selfish and be a MOM!!!!!!
link | posted by Mommy at 7:07 PM
2 Comments:
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Heather Noel had this to say:
Round of applause!! I totally agree.
- 2/03/2007 8:58 AM
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Mandy had this to say:
Wow, you should write a parenting book.
- 2/18/2007 12:14 PM
