LOWERING b (1) : a state of feeling sad : DEJECTION (2) : a psychoneurotic or psychotic disorder marked especially by sadness, inactivity, difficulty in thinking and concentration, a significant increase or decrease in appetite and time spent sleeping, feelings of dejection and hopelessness, and sometimes suicidal tendencies c (1) : a reduction in activity, amount, quality, or force (2) : a lowering of vitality or functional activity
Im not sure if im suffering from depression or postpartum or are they one in the same? It seems like for the past month Ive been just really in the dumps I cant seem to climb out, Its weird Ive never suffered this after any of my other children so I dont wont to say that its from that, but for some reason Im always aggravated with everyone and everything, I know work is gonna be stressful until I get everything caught up that the people prior to me failed to do which seems to be taking longer than what I thought but I dont think thats really it, it just seems like my day is a ongoing repetive thing it never stops and its always the same, Im so quick tempered, the other day It was worse than usual I actually told one of my kids to just leave me alone! What Mother does that??? And Chris I dont know about that I dont even want to be around him and we're never together because of the kids and our work schedules but even when we are I dont say anything to him and if he speaks to me I answer in 1 word answers and I dont know why? He's been so sweet I guess he senses something is wrong, and the other day something really just slapped me in the face, I met someone and his friend referred to me as " oh is this your "baby mama"?" WHAT THE HELL I thought, then it hit me OH my god I am, even though I think my title should be more than that after 5yrs, but its right Im just the girlfriend, Im not even the fiance??? I know I know ive stood firm to the whole idea of Ive been married before and its not a big deal to me but it seems like its meaning more to me now and I dont know why? We've always joked that we are married with the option to leave for free, but here lately I feel like its not enough, I dont know....
I just wish I could get over this, I was sitting at my desk today working and listening to the radio and Jaime ( works with me) goes Becca what wrong? and I realized that I was crying, why? I dont know I was just sitting there crying for no reason, ive picked up smoking really bad again, and the only thing I can think of is I want to go out just me and some girlefriends and get drunk off my butt, and thats not me either, Ive always been a work and come home Mom. Its just what I do but for some reason its not good enough....
I just want to be normal again and be the one thats proud of who I am and what I do but right now Im not....
link | posted by Mommy at 6:24 PM
6 Comments:
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Just Me had this to say:
um wow, what do you say to that, go see your ob, it sounds a little/lot like postpartum.
- 5/31/2006 7:21 PM
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Heather Noel had this to say:
Its funny because I didnt think I got postpartum because it didnt hit me right after Tanner was born. But when he was 4 months old, I cried all the time. I missed a bit of work. Or I left early. I couldnt concentrate all I could do was cry because I left my young un and Scott. Thats all it was. Something that I had done a hundred times before was tearing me up. And it did for about a month. I hope it gets better for you. If you need to talk. We will be home Friday night. So call me, or I'll call you. Later chick
- 5/31/2006 11:41 PM
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RFamily had this to say:
I had p.p. depression with my middle one...it was BAD...lasted for about 6 months. I didn't want to get out of bed, didn't want to do anything. Didn't talk to my husband unless I really had to.
See your ob!!!- 6/01/2006 10:02 AM
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